Rock Stars, Please Be Seated: The Muldoons

There are few things that disturb me more than children who have learned to "act," who take on the pretensions and conventions of adults in an effort to win adult favor. It's an undeniably gross spectacle. But The Muldoons, comprised of a father and his two sons both below the age of twelve, fly right past that, straight into authenticity and kick-you-in-the-crotch rock.

I saw this trio at the Do Division street festival here in Chicago yesterday and left immediately afterward, knowing there was no way anyone was going to top them. Their stage presence should be a warning to most bands: you are very, very boring to watch... please start eating cameras, jumping on each other's back, leaping from amps, collapsing on stage, etc.

I should note that their online recordings don't really do them justice, as eight year-old Shane's voice sounds far wimpier (as one might expect at age eight, after all) than it does distorted in a live setting. But give Robot Car a listen, and you'll get a sense of where these kids are headed.

It's a scary thing to see kids act like adults, but it's scarier (in a good way) when they're plenty real and far better than their elders. The Muldoons aren't acting, they're playing. And playing better than most.